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Writer's pictureKat Frey

Have you had this meal? Are you making your team eat this meal?


You go to a restaurant and take some time to peruse the menu. You decide on something that is described in the menu very well and has your mouth watering! You are excited to try it out. You order it as it is suggested, with no changes, maybe you even choose the drink recommendation. Your server delivers the dish to the table and how do you begin to take in this experience?


You could smell the food as it approached your table.


As it is placed in front of you, you are visually absorbing and consuming this food with your eyes.


You believe at this point you have made a good choice and are ready to taste what you have chosen. Your mouth is even beginning to water!


You take the first bite and it tastes horrible!!!!!


Is this how your customers experience your product? Is this how your employees experience your coaching? If you quickly answered no, take a minute, and think about it. How are you sure that the answer is no?


No matter what your product is, it isn’t the four walls that your business resides in that make it great, it’s the employees that make it great. Maybe those employees aren’t directly yours, maybe they are the delivery company you choose to partner with that delivers exceptional service (still a choice of yours, you ship with them) or maybe it’s another third party you partner with but no matter what, your product can be good, the people make it great.


When the meal was horrible, what happened next to make the situation better? Did the server replace the dish? Did the manager credit the bill? Comp the desert? Did the chef come out and talk to you?


So, let’s talk human element. Is this how your employees feel coached? Are they visual, auditory, kinesthetic learners and you are giving them information that by the time you implement what they agree to, it tastes horrible? Maybe they learn differently than you do so it is going to taste horrible. Learning and communication styles have a huge factor in how people experience each other. Similar to how you absorbed a meal you had high hopes for, an employee wants to be coached and you serve it up all wrong.


Let’s add one more example. Ever heard the term “deaf gain”? My son had a massive hearing loss as a child and learned to sign while we taught him to speak. Now, as a functioning adult, you wouldn’t know he ever had an issue but he learned how to rely on his other senses with greater demand than most 3 or 4-year-olds and he carries that into adulthood. The actual definition of deaf gain is when the hearing impaired are so aware of their other senses and actually have an advantage because of it. Another example is an all-hearing-impaired football team doesn’t need to huddle because they sign. This means they move faster, with less down downtime between plays. The game itself isn’t any different, the players are!


So, if someone you were in a conversation with started giving you signs that they DIDN’T understand what you were saying, how would you pick up on them? Would you pick up on them? What would you notice about someone that meant they were not understanding? What is your “gain”? What is your people’s gain? What is your special sauce? What is your people’s special sauce?


Let me help you answer this….. it’s in your people. If that wasn’t a part of your answer, go talk to them and start LISTENING! Without them you have no team to lead, you are lacking massive amounts of information about your company, and you most likely can’t have your company the way you know it today.



Kat founded a business coaching firm in 2017, Oxygen Equestrian (d.b.a. Oxygen Coaching Group) which originally focused on body language and life skills and has transformed to include executive coaching, sales training, and accountability coaching. Programs are designed to make anyone from the professional to the side hustler, more productive, more aware, and a better employer. Kat is a guest blogger, published on the e-publication Publish, and contributing author with The Rising Sisterhood. She is an Executive Trainer, Coach, and Program Developer for hundreds of companies annually. Learn more about her animals, kids, and philanthropy at oxygencoachingroup.com and sign up for a free coaching session.

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